Andy Lien

I ran metformin side effects and pcos to the fabric store over my lunch hour to buy some supplies for my mother to alter my Maid of Honor dress this weekend.  Carson and Ian’s wedding is July 18 and I need Mother Dearest to work her magic on it so that I don’t trip.  Get this–I’m 5′ 10″ and the dress is too long for me.  Gasp.  Considering that two of the other three women standing up for Carson are taller than me, we’re going to block out the light at the ceremony.  I love it.  I can’t wait.  But, despite the 3″ heels I bought for the occasion, I’m still a walking liability.  Mom to the rescue.

The dress.  Oh, the dress.  I will not reveal it here, but believe me:  The dress is smashing.  It’s sleeveless with a plunging neckline (the cleavage will be something to outlive), a fitted bodice, an empire waist, and three layers of chiffon flowing down to the floor.  The dress takes me back to when I was a wee lass and glued myself to the television set when “Wonder Woman” was on (the Lynda Carter version, though the Justice League was just as intriguing).

Lynda Carter metformin er 500mg side effects and Cloris Leachman...Cloris rocking the Amazon gown. We don't have capes attached to ours, but you get the general idea.

I would watch Wonder Woman (as I called her, “Wuh-wuh Woman”) and dream of being her.  Not Lynda Carter, not Diana Prince…but her.  I wanted to go home to Paradise Island, to the Amazons, and wear long, breezy dresses…my Crystal Gayle hair whipping around me while shooting bulls-eyes with my bow and arrow.  (Okay, so I had a simultaneous fascination with Crystal Gayle.  Work with me.)  I dreamed of flying the invisible jet to rescue Lyle Waggoner and kick Hitler’s ass…though I didn’t know who Hitler was at the time.  I think I made bullet-deflecting bracelets out of aluminum foil to wear with my Wonder Woman Underoos.  Toad after toad was forced to answer my laser-focused questions while entwined with the Lasso of Truth.

The not-so-fantastic (reality) part of my childhood role playing was that my brother decided to cut off all of my long flaxen locks and hide them under the sofa, so I was actually a butch little three-year old Wonder Woman with a nice scab on my chin from the usual shenanigans.

Now, as an adult, I get to realize a small part of those fantasies.  Beautiful Amazonian dress, long flaxen locks, a wedding in Paradise (well, the Bay Area…close enough), and a whole lot of estrogen for good measure.  Fine, fine, fine…since Carson is the bride, she’ll get to be Wonder Woman, but we maidens will be her sister Amazons.

The superpowers?

Those are my mom’s.

***

P.S.  No kidding…this email message popped up as I was writing this post:

If you can't read it, the subject is: "Register to win Lynda Carter's new CD!" Umm...do you have any Crystal Gayle?