Andy Lien

It hasn’ t really metformin hcl 500 mg dosage made men cry.  I just think it works nicely as an attention-grabber.

It has induced gutteral moans, orgasmic sighs, and clandestine taste thefting (not to be confused with taste teth-ting, the result of a too-hot first taste).

It is a dish that is hefty enough for the “meat and potatoes” crowd while also being enough of a novelty to intrigue even the most distinguished of palates…the dish has a good nose to it.

And it’s the easiest thing to make in the world.

Really.  People would kill for the recipe; while it would be worth it, I’ll save you the effort.

I’ll even let you name it something else.  You don’t even have to attribute it to me…”Andy’s Make Men Cry Braised Beef” sounds too much like “Andy Makes Men Cry.”  While it could be true, it does not help my cause whatsoever.  Plain ol’ “Make Men Cry Braised Beef” lends a little S&M flair. “Balsamic Braised Beef” is what I use for catering gigs.  “Lazy Braised Beef” is probably the most accurate of names.

Lazy Braised Beef it is.  You’ll see why it’s so apropos.

Ingredients

Salt
Pepper
2- 3lb Beef metformin hcl 500 mg side effects Chuck Roast
1 Onion, large, chopped
1/2 c Balsamic Vinegar
1/2 c Honey
1 packet Lipton Onion Soup Mix

That’s it.  There’s the big secret.  Lipton Onion Soup Mix.  Heck, you can even use a generic onion soup mix (see…I didn’t capitalize it to indicate it’s generic).  Just make sure that it’s plain “onion” and not some fancy schmancy “Golden Onion” or “Some Other Marketing Term Onion” to make you want to buy it.  Onion.  Pure and simple.

Directions:

1. Put a large pot with a lid on a burner and turn the burner on HI.
2. Remove meat from packaging and pat it dry with a paper towel.
3. Sprinkle all sides of meat with salt and pepper.
4. Once pot is super-duper hot, throw in the meat and sear it on all sides.  If it’s a flat roast, just go for the two flat sides.  If it’s a more cube-like roast, sear as many sides as you can flip it onto.  You know a side is done searing when it “releases” when you try to move it.  If it sticks to the hot surface, it isn’t done searing.  Yes, it can get a bit burnt-like, but it’ll be all the better for it.
5. After searing, turn down burner to LO or between LO and MED…LO if you can leave it for at least 2 hours, between LO and MED if you need it to happen faster.
6. Add vinegar, honey, onions, and soup mix.  Stir.
7. Put a lid on it and walk away.  Seriously.  Don’t mess with it.  You leave it there for hours, just flipping the meat every once in a while.  DO NOT ADD ANYTHING.  DO NOT SUBTRACT ANYTHING.  The onions will release some nice liquid and meld with the rest of the goop and all will be well.  It’s not under- or over-liquidy.  It’s perfect.
8. Go do something else.  For a long time.  Kick up your feet.  Watch a movie.  Put together a puzzle.  Pay your bills.  Entertain your guests.  Eat some appetizers…but not too many, the main event is coming up.
9. 1 1/2 to 3 hours later, do a reduction to finish the dish.  (I’ve had to do a “Make Men Cry Really Quick Braised Beef” in as few as 90 minutes, but I don’t recommend it.  The longer it goes the more it makes ‘em bawl.  Doing it too fast might require a kick to the shin to bring on the waterworks.)  A reduction is when you raise the temperature to boil down some of the liquid, releasing water but keeping flavor.  And, oh the flavor it keeps.  This is how easy it is…plan on about 10-15 minutes for the reduction and wear an apron if your pot is shallow:  Remove the lid, turn up the heat to HI, and let it go.  It’ll start boiling, but don’t fret.  Boiling is good.  Keep the meat in there for about half the time…using it to scrape along the bottom everyone once in a while.  Flip it.  If it gets too dark for your comfort (as in a little burned-looking), remove it.  Either way, remove it when the boiling liquid starts to thicken.  It’ll look like a Witch’s Brew.  After it looks like the liquid has reduced to about half its original volume and it’s more swampy-looking than not, turn off the heat and remove the pot.
10. Slice the beef against the grain, lay out nicely on a platter, and spoon the gloppy goo across the top.  Or, leave goo to be served by ladle and bowl.  Beware: It will cool and congeal…and look a little ugly.  So what?  Yum.

Serve it with potatoes as the starch–not rice or noodles.  Really.  Believe me.  It needs the soft, buttery creaminess of potatoes rather than the somewhat rigid consistency of rice or noodles.  And, I think it looks better.  So there.

It’s fast, it’s fantastic, and I’ll never tell anyone that there was no slaving over a hot stove involved in making it.

Honestly, the ingredients don't have to be uber-expensive. I've got the store brand stuff here.

Freshly ground pepper. I'm sure sprinkling some not-so-fresh stuff would work just fine.

For a recipe this easy, I am NOT going to dirty a cutting board.

Seared, honeyed, vinegared, onioned, and souped. Put a lid on it.

Midway inspection...plenty au jus. Heh.

**Take a moment to cut your finger while using a mandoline to prepare the potato side dish.  Boil some potatoes instead.**

Boil, baby, boil.

Thick enough to call it quits.

Slice.

Serve.

Savor.