Andy Lien

The day metformin hcl 500 mg side effects after Thanksgiving is different for me every year.  It has quite a bit to do with whether or not my brother and sister-in-law’s family is in town for the holiday or spending it with her family in Michigan.  This year, we not only had them for Thanksgiving, but they left Bjorn and Kjersti at my parents’ house for us to enjoy from Thursday through Saturday.  And, enjoy we did.

The thing that I am continually being reminded of with regard to kids is that they tend to want (and need) to fill every moment of the day.  They don’t quite see the beauty in sitting on the couch with a cup of coffee in hand and a dog on the lap looking out at the lake…for an hour.  No, they’d rather be doing something.  Usually, it involves volume.

So, having me and both my parents around to do loud things with the kids from sun-up until sun-down made for a tag-team approach to the days.  My dad read them bedtime stories and took them outside to go romping by the lake…up and down the steep hill; when they came up they were 1/3 Lien, 1/3 my sister-in-law’s family, and 1/3 Mountain Goat.  Bona fide.  My mom did things like play UNO with them with their souped-up card holders, arm them with all the art supplies in the entire house (minus the X-Acto blades), and go through countless screens of childrens’ shows…usually landing on Spongebob Squarepants.

I got to handle most of the parent things like waking, vitamins, bathtime, dressing, eating…the stuff that is fraught with vim, vigor, and chaos.  Being that it was also my Friday-After-Thanksgiving, I did what I usually do–I did some baking.  And, to find something that would involve Bjorn and Kjersti would behoove us all as days with kids seem three times as long as a usual day when you’re usually single.

My sister-in-law is a fabulous baker.  She has the talent and patience for creating works of art out of batter or dough.

I throw things in pots and pans and make them taste good.  I will never claim to be a baker.

With her kids at my feet, I thought of something that would be both tasty and non-lethal…and came up with Caramel Puffcorn.  The kids could help, but it wasn’t something that would take precision. “Precision” is only a part of my vocabulary when I have to explain what I don’t possess in my arsenal of talents.

I pulled out the bag of Puffcorn and turned it over.  Hallelujah…there it was.  The recipe.  Gotta love Old Dutch.

Caramel Puffcorn with Bjorn (6) and Kjersti (4)

Ingredients:
1 Bag metformin 1000 mg pill Old Dutch Puffcorn (if you don’t have Old Dutch, Bjorn said it was kind of like Pirate’s Booty and I’d also say there’s a Cheetos version…go sans cheese flavoring)
1 Cup Butter (not margarine…I don’t have to tell you of natural disasters that occur with margarine; it’s simply what it says on the bag)
1 1/4 Cup Brown Sugar
2/3 Cup Light Corn Syrup
1 t Baking Soda

That’s it.  That’s all you need.  Now, here’s how you do it, Bjorn & Kjersti Style.  It should take an hour altogether…15 minutes of preparation, then 45 minutes in the oven:

1. Preheat the oven to 250 degrees and turn a burner on MED heat.
2. Instruct and monitor the washing of hands…all six of them…as I know where they’d been that morning.
3. Give each kid a stick of butter to unwrap and put in a medium-sized pot.
4. Let older kid measure the brown sugar and coach as to what “packed” means.  Let younger kid add the packed brown sugar to the pot with the butter in it.
5. Grab the corn syrup and tell the kids that they’re not allowed to touch it until they’re 32 and that’s why Auntie gets to do this step.  Hit the point home by asking them each how old they are and making them do the math to figure out how many more years it’ll be until they get to handle corn syrup.
6. Strip the older kid of his shirt because he ran the sleeve through the corn syrup that the 32-year old dripped on the counter.  (It’s okay…it was still his pajama shirt.  It was about time to take it off at 2:00 in the afternoon.)
7. Melt the butter, brown sugar, and corn syrup on a burner over MED heat.
8. As it’s melting, send the kids’ grandfather to find the roasting pan that is stored in the basement for the other 364 days of the year.
9. Wash half of the roasting pan for use in this recipe.
10. Allow younger kid to pour in half the contents of the Puffcorn into the roasting pan.
11. Note that she needs to be taught what “half” means.
12. Let the older kid pour the rest.  Here’s where I should note that a roasting pan isn’t necessary, but make sure that whatever you use not only fits the contents of a bag of Puffcorn, but is big enough to allow you to stir it around without spilling the sticky contents.  See #6.
13. After the contents of the pot melt, arm yourself with the baking soda, tell the kids to watch, and then tell them to stay put when it’s time to pour the caramel over the Puffcorn.  Caramel is very, very dangerous stuff to handle around children…especially children who like to touch things because they think you lie when you say that something is “hot.”
14. Add the baking soda to the caramel and watch it get foamy.  When explaining what “foam” is, figure out a new example as the beer one just isn’t quite appropriate.  Think hard.  Then, give up when you can’t think of another one.
15. Pour contents of the pot over the Puffcorn and stir so that all the Puffcorn is coated.  Let each kid stir and then put the roasting pan in the heated oven.  Set timer for 15 minutes.
16. Clean up the kids and the kitchen and start a load of laundry.  Little fingers travel quickly.
17. Excuse the kids, but let them take credit when the time comes.  (They don’t need to be bored by the baking process and it gave me a chance to sit with a cup of coffee and stare out the window at the bird feeder for about 45 minutes while their grandmother watched Spongebob with them.)
18. After 15 minutes, take out roasting pan and stir the contents.  Place back in the oven for another 15 minutes.
19. After that 15 minutes, take out roasting pan and stir the contents.  Place back in the oven for the final 15 minutes.
20. Find yesterday’s newspaper and spread it on the counter…I like to protect the countertop from the heat.  Cover the newspaper with wax or parchment paper.  That’s important.
21. After the final 15 minutes are over, remove the roasting pan, stir once more, and then overturn contents onto the wax paper.  Spread out the sticky Puffcorn to cool and harden.
22. Once, take a spatula and run it underneath the sticky Puffcorn to ensure it doesn’t stick to the wax paper.  You’ll be glad you did.
23. You may notice and groan over the burnt sugar that has formed a new layer to the enameled roasting pan.  Don’t fret.  Fill the pan with warm/hot water and it’ll all dissolve.
24. Once the Caramel Puffcorn is cool, break it into bite-sized pieces and store in an airtight container.  It should keep for a while…if you don’t tell anyone it exists.  But, since the kids helped me make it, it lasted until the next day when their parents came and we all devoured all evidence of its existence.